Let
us discuss Shawn Cohen
(My
little disclaimer: As with all Survivor
profiles, I am totally making all this
stuff up as if I actually have a clue.
I do not in any way know any of these
survivors. However, I've received many
emails from past Survivors complimenting
me on my insight. So, although I make
this crap up, sometimes I'm actually right.)
Quote:
He notes that his friends and family have
dubbed him "The Ultimate Salesman."
His
audition video on the official CBS site
must've been edited down because it's
very short and all he discusses, with
what seems to be two or three women in
the room, is how he won a huge amount
of money in Vegas playing Blackjack (almost
$200,000) while he was in college.
He
grins in a male model sort of way and
giggles and all the girls in the night
club just can't enough of him.
In
the video profile, he just comes across
a little ego-driven and shallow. He said,
"I'VE BEEN TOLD..." stressing
the I've been told so that we don't think
he's a complete arrogant ass, "that
I'm charismatic." Yada yada.
Then
he says the generic quote that I just
can't stand, "I live life every day
to the fullest."
Usually
when people say this, they've listened
to a bunch of self-help tapes in hopes
that they somehow find happiness and fulfillment,
things that they sorely lack but do an
extremely good job at convincing people
that they have. Shawn will receive a wake-up
call when he sees someone like Burton
who's just as charismatic and good-looking
but actually seems to have a future other
than scrounging up sales positions just
to buy expensive toys to impress people
with.
He
also shares this in the video:
"I
was in a long relationship that... fell
apart in the end. Umm... it didn't work
out. And I think, through that experience,
I've learned a lot about myself as well
as relationships and life, in general.
And... and I'm THANKFUL for that."
If that girl who dumped him in a bad way
is reading this, could you please email
me? I'd love to hear what happened because
he stumbled over those words in a huge
way trying to show that he's ok and that
he's a better person now and that he won't
still obsess over her on the island and
that she isn't a COMPLETE AND TOTAL BITCH!!
I
don't know why I think this, because there
really isn't anything that alludes to
this in his profile or videos, but my
gut feeling tells me that this person
is tough on the exterior and cream-puff-waiting-to-explode-in-a-poofy-powder-creamed-filling-I'm-really-a-failure-in-someone-who's-very-important-to-me's-eyes-sort-of-way
interior.
Shawn
is my pick to be the first to throw a
fit and/or to insult and yell at someone.
I
could be entirely mistaken about him.
If so, I will add to this profile throughout
the season correcting myself and admitting
my inaccuracies completely. Feel free
to send any thoughts and disagreements
to
since I can't seem to think of anything
else to say about this guy.
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